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Nicole Fergesen

January 26, 2017

Fighting the Battle of Motherhood

I was joking around with my best friend’s husband a bit ago about how blessed I am to be able to stay at home with my kids. I don’t get that Sunday night pit-in-my-stomach thinking about going into “work” the next morning. I am so thankful for the freedom and ability to create my own days and spend all my time with my children. But there are moments, days, or even weeks that I struggle. And right now, I feel like life is a battle. Meals are a battle. Naptime is a battle. Getting buckled into the car is a battle. Fun activities are even a battle. I find myself just wishing for naptime and just plain worn out by the end of the day.

It is hard to keep my focus as a mom when the kids have been screaming all day long and I am just tapped out. But when I sit back and think about it, they are just kids with a sin nature (like me!), and it is my job to teach and to train them how to become responsible adults. What an overwhelming thought! When I get into a funk when I feel like I just can’t win, it is hard to get over it. What I have come to realize is that it is just as simple as my perspective.

Knowing myself, my first response to a tough situation would be to get mad, overwhelmed, frustrated, or anxious. I get down on myself because I need to be doing a better job. Instead of thinking those negative thoughts, I need to be proactive with the kids and find a way to counteract the whininess or attitudes. Instead of feeling defeated, I need to focus on the blessing it is to have these wonderful and unique children in my life. I need to reflect on the fact that I am so blessed to be able to stay home and spend my days with them. In those moments when I am wishing I had a job outside the home, I need to take a step back and thank God that I have the opportunity, no- privilege, to stay at home with my kids. (Not that there is anything wrong with working outside the home, I just know that right now I am called to be at home with my kids.)

I hope you know that you are not alone. You are not the only one that struggles or has bad days. Staying at home can feel isolating at times, even if we have a community built up around us for support. This phase of life is exhausting, overwhelming, and oftentimes thankless. Even if you work outside the home, it can be just as tiring. Do the best that you can; you are probably doing a better job than you think. You are fighting the good fight and it will be worth it. You are doing a great thing. God created you to be your children’s mother, not someone else. Keep at it. Keep fighting. We are all in this together.

 

 

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Posted In: Babies, Health, Uncategorized · Tagged: battle, Blog, blogger, children, encouragement, grace, kids, lifestyle blogger, mom, motherhood, SAHM, toddlers, WAHM

Comments

  1. Sarah says

    January 26, 2017 at 9:34 am

    Totally with you. ❤
    Thanks for this!

    Reply
    • Nicole Warner says

      January 26, 2017 at 9:40 am

      ?

      Reply
  2. Naomi says

    January 26, 2017 at 4:07 pm

    I’m right there with you! I actually just had one of those refresh moments where I realized I’d been living for nap time/bedtime several days in a row and had to remind myself that these days go by so fast. Gotta remember why I’m doing this and how important it is! ❤

    Reply
    • Nicole Warner says

      January 26, 2017 at 4:28 pm

      So glad I’m not the only one! ? We have the most important job in the world ???

      Reply
  3. Denise Wilkinson says

    March 1, 2017 at 9:09 pm

    Well, I have to say that it gives me great comfort to know that Moms like you are giving their heart and strength every day, carrying on the best that they can with the most important job in the world. Every night that I pray for my daughter and daughters in law I feel so overwhelmingly blessed that I know my grandkids are loved and tucked in. The day may have been hard, the kids not feeling well and cranky, tons of laundry, bills to be paid, groceries needed, house disorganized, and the Moms totally exhausted and almost feeling somewhat defeated but I KNOW that they will be back at it in the morning. And if one of my grands is awake tonight teething, sick or feverish, their Mommy will be right there for them, forgetting her own need for sleep.. I see them doing an awesome job, better than I ever did, and carrying the torch of a fierce love that only another mother can know. Keep on no matter what! Someday you Moms will know the joy and peace that comes from being in my place, a Mom and grandmom ( YaYa actually ) …

    Reply
    • Nicole Warner says

      March 1, 2017 at 9:16 pm

      It is because of amazing women like you that there are good people in this world! I hope I can be even half the mother you are and continuously make my kids a priority. You’re right, it isn’t easy. But it’s a choice and an easy one when it comes down to it. Thank you for the affirmation! ?

      Reply

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Hey There!

About Me
I am Nicole Fergesen, mama to four, new Iowan and part time New Hampshire girl. I believe in Jesus, live on coffee, and love functional fashion. I also dabble in home design and relentlessly find beauty in everything. Wife to Dustin, widow of Marcus, blending a family and finding grace in the journey.
One Month
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One Year Without You

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